disintegration's Xanga

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

Wed, 06 Feb 2008 20:35:43 GMT

Been a while, hasn't it?

I/we/they had been warned about a werewolf-ish contagion that was going around. I am the male half of a couple, Lysistrae(?) and Marguielles(?). We are in a small room with the door closed. She goes rabid and I hold her from behind, trying to keep her face away from me. I have the impression that her head is now snout-like, like a dog or wolf, even though it still looks perfectly normal. She keeps trying to turn around to snap/bite at me. At some point, I suppose I lose my grip. She mauls the lower half of my body, gnaws through my stomach and mangles my legs. It's quite painful.

Notable for the pain.

There was also something about a woman named Straya/Straia. Odd because people don't usually have names in my dreams. I wish I could remember more, but there were too many distractions between waking and now. The atmosphere had the same muted and gloomy, despairing tone that permeates most of my interesting dreams (it's been a while). Glad to have that back, but I could have done without the pain.

There was another dream I had some months ago regarding sealing myself up in my apartment along with a couple of other people. There were severed hands crawling up the sides of the building. It wasn't a terrifying threat--just something I'd rather not come in contact with. (Don't ask me; I don't know how my brain works either.)

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Tue, 16 Oct 2007 16:35:21 GMT

Oh my. This just might be the creepiest thing ever.

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

Tue, 09 Oct 2007 14:57:37 GMT

In case you haven't already heard, Blade Runner (Final Cut) is playing for a limited time in NY and LA. Go see it!

Monday, August 06, 2007

Mon, 06 Aug 2007 20:23:37 GMT

Supervisor: (mock outrage) What are you doing?! You're playing a game!
Me: I'm on my lunch break! I'm killing zombies on my lunch break!
Coworker: ...Because we're under attack..?
Me: Exactly! They'd be overrunning the building if not for me.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Wed, 25 Jul 2007 20:32:24 GMT

So awesome! (WANT)

One Night of Fire - The one picture I could find of me spinning. That's me in the corner (must. not. make bad REM joke). Right hand side with the big circles? Yep.

In other news, the ceiling in my bathroom collapsed because of water damage--I'd been complaining about the leaking for months, but they never fixed it. (Clarification: from the asshole upstairs neighbors, not from roof damage or whatever.) Any lawyers in my audience? I should post the video I took of one of the leaking occasions (read: waterfall) sometime.

Friday, July 13, 2007

Fri, 13 Jul 2007 19:11:29 GMT

One Night of Fire
Renegade Parade
Sat., July 14
Meet at 7:57pm in the middle of the Brooklyn Bridge

I'll probably be spinning. Come by.

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Tue, 03 Jul 2007 17:57:13 GMT

Last weekend:

[My favorite fire spinning couple who are moving away soon]
MG: (holding a lighter to her pants for ~5 seconds) I think these are synthetic, but they should be fine. (pause) I checked them in the dressing room.
R: You did that in the dressing room?!?! What if they'd gone up?
MG: That's what they say you're supposed to do.
R: But what if it had gone up?
Me: I guess you go out to the dressing room attendant and say "Sorry, I won't be taking these. They spontaneously combusted on me."?

Later that night while they're cuddled together:
MG: You know what he just said to me? "I love the smell of burnt hair on you."

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Tue, 05 Jun 2007 13:02:28 GMT

MB: So I met a knife thrower's assistant the other day.
FB: Was she really hot?
MB: No--yeah, you would think that a knife thrower's assistant would be really hot, but she was pretty normal looking. I mean, she was attractive, but she's not someone who would turn heads on the street or anything.
FB: So how do you get a job as a knife thrower's assistant anyway?
MB: Well, it does help to be attractive. But it seems that the most important quality you need to have is the ability to not flinch when someone's throwing knives at you.
(collective pause)
Me: ...I guess that makes sense.

Monday, June 04, 2007

Mon, 04 Jun 2007 14:51:18 GMT

They make Hieronymus Bosch action figures!

Friday, June 01, 2007

Fri, 01 Jun 2007 17:07:42 GMT

Dear Aetna,

Your Health Savings Account sounded like a good idea until I tried to use it. Your brochure stated that I would be able to withdraw funds from it from an ATM. I attempted to do so in order to reimburse myself for medical expenses I paid out-of-pocket. The transaction was denied.

I called you twice in an attempt to resolve the problem. The first time, after spending ten minutes identifying myself to your system, your system told me that there was an error and that I should call Aetna between their office hours of 8am - 9pm. The second time I called (before 9), after spending another ten minutes with your system, I was told that there was an error and that I should call Aetna between your office hours of 8am - 6pm. I do not understand how your office hours changed so drastically in the space of a day. I also do not understand why your system cannot tell me in the beginning that it is after hours. Why do I need to identify myself before I am told that the office is closed? Additionally, why does your recording have to speak so sloooooooooooowwwwly? Did you record the message in Miami or somewhere? I would also like to advise you that I am of the opinion that pressing buttons is less demeaning than being forced to speak to an automated system. I implore you to allow me, in the future, to use my keypad rather than forcing me to speak to your system.

After the first two failed attempts at communication, I decided to send an email through your website instead. I regret that your office hours are also my office hours, and therefore inconvenient for me. I received an email reply from you today. After spending some minutes attempting unsuccessfully to decrypt it (I see you take your security seriously. Bravo.), I caved and downloaded it to read. What with the security, I was expecting a high-level, detailed response to my inquiry. Imagine my disappointment when I read that I should contact JP Morgan Chase instead. (I see that you encrypt messages frivolously. You have been permanently filed into the 'retard' category.)

In conclusion, I wanted to thank you for being spectacularly unhelpful. I will be attempting to contact JP Morgan Chase, whom I fully expect will send me right back to you. I expect to be contacting you again shortly. Until then,

Yours Faithfully,
Me